So your child comes to you and tells you he is gay or she is lesbian. You feel that the earth has dropped out from under your feet. You look at them and try to read their faces. A million questions go through your mind. You look at them and wait, are they joking? Your mind screams, “Please just laugh and say I’m only joking”. It does not come. You realise this is real. You feel for a moment you’re in a Mexican standoff.
Your child cannot see the person at the other end of the computer. There is no way for children to know who they are talking to. The paedophile will start an innocent conversation with your child. They are very good at posing as young children and are up to date with what children like, are interested in and the latest trends. At first, the questions will be innocent and seemingly harmless.
My husband and I are in the fortunate position where both our parents are alive and involved in our child’s life. Although they live far away, we ensure that they visit us regularly or we try to visit them as often as possible. Whenever I see our little one interacting with her grandparents I am in awe of the total bliss and delight both parties experience. It made me realize just how important this intergenerational relationship is and how much everyone involved can benefit from it.
Oh, but the TIREDNESS. I will never forget. Never ever, ever, ever!! It lasted for 18 years (sorry my dearest sisters). One night I woke up and I couldn’t find my sweetheart last born - oh my freak! She was lying on the carpet! What was happening to me? How did she land there? Was I going to be arrested for child abuse? I could just see the headlines: “Social worker abandons newborn on floor”.
This article will provide you as parent with an overall view of anxiety in children, as well as some practical tips on how to help your little one manage or overcome his anxiety.
It is well known that no two children are the same, not even when from the same parents. The same is true for the love language of your child. Every child perceive, understand and show love in different ways. What is important for one child, may not even be noticed by another child. And that is exactly where miscommunication and misunderstanding easily happens.
Mia Keller Pringle het in 1996 kinders se 5 basiese emosionele behoeftes omsrkyf waarvan LIEFDE volgens my die belangrikste is. 'n Kind wat onvoorwaardelike liefde ervaar, reeds vanaf voor geboorte af, het 'n emosionele voorsprong op alle vlakke, want kyk as jy weet jy is geliefd by die huis kan die lewe maar kom - ek het 'n vangnet wat vir my die nodige selfvertroue gee om alle uitdagings te hanteer. Hoe dra ons daardie soort liefde oor?
No parent wants to even think about the possibility of sexual abuse getting anywhere near their family, however, this is one of those horrible realities that we need to be aware of. Our Child Therapist, Heske Sangster, answers some important questions regarding sexual abuse and forensic assessments.
Alle mense het ‘n sekere vlak van stress of uitdagings nodig om optimaal te kan funksioneer. Sonder enige uitdagings gaan niemand hul volle potensiaal besef en bereik nie. Party kinders kan egter stress beter hanteer as ander. Spanning en angs kan ‘n destruktiewe effek op ‘n tiener se emosionele gesondheid hê en kan selfs lei to angs versteurings. Indien jy as ouer bekommerd is dat jou kind ‘n angs versteuring ontwikkel is dit beter om professionele hulp in te kry sodat hy of sy die regte hulp ontvang.
Die belangrikste van alles: hou jouself kalm en beheerd! ‘n Kind kyk na sy ouer se reaksie om die mate van bedreiging te bepaal. As hy sien jy is duidelik omgekrap, emosioneel en huilerig, gaan hy ook so reageer. Probeer kalm, ontspanne en vriendelik bly wanneer jy en jou kind skei, dit sal hom automaties meer kalm en veilig laat voel.
Spel word gesien as die universiele taal van kinders, afgesien van etiese herkoms, agtergrond of sosio-ekonomiese geskiedenis. Spel oftewel “speel” word beskou as kinders se woorde, kinders gebruik spel in dieselfde manier as wat volwassenes woorde gebruik. Dikwels speel kinders hul probleme of emosies op ‘n simboliese manier uit, om sodoende hulself uit te druk.
One of the biggest mistakes we as parents can ever make, is making our children feel that our love for them and our acceptance of them depends on academic achievement. Your child needs to know that,no matter what, they are enough. It's so easy to compare our children with other kids and setting our expectations of them, based on other children's achievements and capabilities. Don't do this – every child differs and you need to help your child understand that his/her best really is good enough. Praise best effort, not high marks!
Getting divorced is never easy, especially in the case where children are involved. By really keeping your child’s best interest at heart and not letting your hurt take over in the conversation, you can inform your children about the divorce in a manner that really does help them in the long run.
By making sure that you have a secure attachment with your child, you will help him learn that he is okay, worthy and good enough (at the very least). That you as his parents are trustworthy and that the world is a safe place that can be explored confidently. Most importantly, not only will you be giving your child a head start in life personally, but also interpersonally; when it comes to all his future relationships.
Soms verwoord 'n kind hierdie emosionele impak op sy/haar slaap roetine as " 'n vrees vir die donker", bloot omdat hul nie ander woorde daarvoor het nie. Dit is juis daarom baie belangrik dat jy in gesprek met jou kind tree om te probeer verstaan wat rondom die "donker" vrees veroorsaak.
Once a partner (the divorce initiator) informs the other partner that he or she wants a divorce the first thing they do; or the first advice they receive, is to get themselves a lawyer who can take care of the situation. Whilst it is not wrong to get a lawyer to represent you, there are other options to keep in mind. Many people are not knowledgeable about the law, especially the Children’s Act 38 of 2005 which provides guidelines as to how to go about a divorce when children are involved.
Ongelukkig lewe ons in ‘n wereld waar ons en ons kinders op ‘n daaglikes basis gebombardeer word met dinge van ‘n seksuele aard. Dit word as’t ware op ‘n silwer skinkbord agter ons aangedra en na ons toe uitgehou; om elke hoek en draai. Ons word stelselmatig so gedesensitiseer daardeur, dat ons dit self dalk nie eens meer agterkom nie.
Especially in the teen years, the last person a child might like to turn to is the parents, and here a grandparent could be a shoulder to cry on, and the comfort here for parents is that the person your child turns to is usually someone you trust with regards to morals and values. Also because grandparents tend to not be as busy and rushed as parents are now a days; it’s a great place to truly get some quality attention. In short it’s an additional safe place for your child to turn to.
Ek dink nie daar word net op huisvroue neergesien nie. Ek dink ons beweeg in ‘n tyd, waar die teenoorgestelde ook baie waar is. Sommige huisvroue sien maar net so neer op beroepsvroue.
Dit lê werklik swaar op my hart dat ons as vroue moet saamstaan. Dat ons moet ophou om mekaar sleg te maak, te kritiseer, te skinder en neer te kyk op mekaar. Elke vrou het haar eie paadjie wat sy stap, elke vrou het haar eie battles wat sy fight.
A psychological assessment of a young child’s readiness takes into consideration as many factors as possible that could impact on the child’s formative years and initial experiences of school. It is followed by a detailed background record, pre-school reports, parent interviews, and other collateral evidence which might assist the psychologist to get a full profile of the child.
We as parents are obligated to know that children’s developmental needs are different for each child and that children mature differently. Each child is an individual with specific talents and in some cases deficits. Your children are mostly writing exams at this time of the year. The report will be a good indicator of where support and guidance is needed. But we also need to remember that academia is but one part of the child’s growing up. Blaming the school for the child not progressing would be too simplistic, as we know, that school is but one factor that determines academic success.
Attachment forms during the first couple of years of a child’s life. A parent or caregiver’s emotional availability for the child from the day of birth is extremely important. Attachment forms when a caregiver is sensitive to needs of the child and reacts to these needs appropriately. The first four years of a toddlers life is viewed as the fundamental time when attachment forms. The manner in how the parent or caregiver communicates with the child on both a verbal and non-verbal manner has a significant impact on how the child will view the world. The type of attachment that your child will develop, will affect the attachment (whether secure of insecure) your child will have, not only with you, but also with their peers and others they will meet on their journey in this world. Parents or caregivers are the main players in a child’s life and will often determine whether a child develops a secure or an insecure attachment.
I honestly think using rewards to change or enhance behaviors in children is an excellent and positive tool. We often fall into the habit of focusing only on the misbehavior of our children, and then punishing them for that; either by taking away privileges, spanking, yelling, threatening and the problem here is that this negative focus on the child, very seldom has a long term effect in changing the behavior.
Between 18 months and 2 years old, for example, a child has a deep seated need to do things for him or herself, and if an older brother or sister, who wants to be a good helper and who wants to do everything for the younger one then comes and interferes, that could cause a lot of frustration-on both sides.
And so we can go through all the different stages of life and have a number of situations that could cause rivalry.
“Moenie jou energie mors deur ‘n leun te lewe nie. Gebruik daardie energie om te kan verander wat jy kan en aanvaar die dinge wat jy nie kan verander nie. Wees wie jy gemaak is om te wees – want daardie persoon is uniek en wonderlik.”
